What should I do with my pet's ashes?

Take this short quiz to discover meaningful ways to honor your pet's memory.

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How do you want to feel when you think about your pet's memorial?

The First Month

Practical help for the days after your pet dies.

Questions to ask a crematory. Words for telling children. Pages for decisions about ashes and belongings.

26 one-page cards, printable checklists, and fillable worksheets. Choose the situation you need help with and start there.

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The crematory call

Full preview of The crematory call. Questions and space for answers. Select Read text for the accessible text version.

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Card 1 of 26, free

The first night

The rule: nothing has to be decided tonight, except one thing.

Read tonight's card

If they are still at home with you

The one thing to decide tonight is where they rest until morning. That is all.

  • Lay them on a towel or a blanket in the coolest room you have: a laundry room, a garage, a tiled floor. Not the car.
  • If you can, settle them on their side with the legs gently tucked, the way they slept. Do this soon rather than later. Within a few hours the body stiffens, and it becomes harder to move them with care.
  • A little fluid can release. One towel underneath and one folded over is enough. This is normal, and it is not a sign that anything was done wrong.
  • In a cool room they can stay overnight and through tomorrow. If it is warm where you are, wrap them in the blanket and then a large bag, and use the coolest space you have.
  • Collar on or collar off. Either is fine. Many people take it off tonight and are glad later that they did.

If they died at the vet's

Then the where is already handled, and there is nothing you have to do tonight. The clinic will keep them safely until you have chosen what happens next. You can call in the morning. Card 4 covers what you can still ask the clinic for: time with them, a paw print, the collar back.

What you do not have to do tonight

  • Choose a crematory. Tomorrow is fine. Almost every crematory collects within a day, and the person who answers the phone has heard every version of this call. Card 3 has the eight questions to ask.
  • Decide private or communal. Card 2, when you are ready.
  • Tell everyone. Tell the people in the house. Everyone else can wait until tomorrow, or next week.
  • Move anything. The bowl, the bed, the leash by the door: leave them exactly where they are. Card 7 is for when you want it, and there is no deadline.

What to say in the house tonight

To a child: "[Name] died today. Her body stopped working and the vet could not fix it. It was not anyone's fault. We are going to be sad for a while, and that is okay." Then stop talking and let them ask. Card 6 has more, by age.

To each other: nothing clever. "I am so sad" is a complete sentence.

One small thing, if you want one

Sit with them for a few minutes. Tell them one thing you will miss. Turn off the light.

That is a goodbye, and it counts. A fuller one can come later, and card 16 will help. Tonight, this is enough.

If tonight feels like more than you can carry, card 25 has people who answer the phone at this hour.

How this quiz works

After cremation, most pet owners are left wondering what to do with their pet's ashes. The options range from simple urns and garden scattering to cremation jewelry and memorial diamonds, and the right choice is deeply personal. This quiz asks five questions to match your preferences against the main categories of memorial options.

The main categories

Decorative urns ($60–$400) keep ashes in a dedicated place of honor at home: wood, ceramic, or hand-painted. Cremation jewelry ($75–$400) lets you carry a small amount of ashes on you every day. Memorial diamonds ($3,000–$20,000) grow a real diamond from carbon extracted from ashes. Living memorials($30–$200) dedicate a tree, rose bush, or garden to your pet, sometimes with ashes mixed into the soil.

Affiliate disclosure

This quiz matches your preferences to memorial options. Our recommendations include links to products we've reviewed. Some links are affiliate links, meaning we may earn a commission at no extra cost to you. We only recommend products we'd use ourselves.

For a deeper look at creating a meaningful memorial, read our full guide. If you're still early in the process and wondering about cremation itself, see what happens during pet cremation.

Frequently asked questions

The most common options include keeping ashes in a decorative urn, wearing cremation jewelry, creating a memorial diamond, scattering in a meaningful location, or planting a living memorial with a tree or plant. There is no wrong choice: the right option is whatever feels meaningful to your family.
There is no time limit. Cremated remains are stable indefinitely. Many pet owners keep ashes for months or years before deciding on a permanent memorial, and some never move beyond a simple urn on a shelf, and that is equally valid.
Yes. Most cremation jewelry and keepsake urns require only a small amount of ashes, often less than a teaspoon. A typical pet cremation yields enough ashes for multiple memorials, meaning a family can share matching pendants or split ashes between a home urn and several keepsakes.
Yes. Companies like Eterneva extract carbon from cremated remains and grow a real diamond under high pressure and heat over 6–10 months. The resulting stone is chemically identical to a mined diamond and can be cut and set into any piece of jewelry.
Most cremation jewelry is designed for daily wear but should be removed before swimming, showering, or exposure to chemicals. Pendants with glass-sealed ash chambers are most water-resistant; open-back lockets are not. Check each piece's care instructions.

Related reading

Deeper reading

Creating a meaningful pet memorial at home

Rituals, spaces, and objects that help carry memory forward.
Product review

Eterneva memorial diamonds: our review

We followed the full ash-to-diamond process for 11 months.
Process

What happens during pet cremation

Intake, identification, cremation, and the return of ashes, step by step.